Snuggies are awesome.

I love them.

I own two.

One was for my Halloween costume. (We went as “Direct Marketing Family”)

I won the other at the infamous CheeseburgHER party at Mom 2.0 in Houston.

These suckers are handy to have around.

You might need one some night.

Like when you’ve been alone in the house all day and realize you are out of Diet Coke just as the baby goes down for the night but then talk to your husband who is finally on his way back home from work and talk him into bringing you one home and you are so grateful you decide to say “THANK YOU” with some YEE HAW! NAKED TIME!!! which is pretty dang easy since you were already in your underwear dancing around the living room to “Thriller” because having the house to yourself for the evening usually involves the shedding of clothing in your world and then you get all sexy and coyly poised on the couch but then realize that OMG! you are SUCH a girl and are freezing your rear end off laying there all alluring-like and that as magical as your boobies are, they just don’t look awesome covered in goose bumps, so you slip into your leopard print Snuggie JUST before your husband walks in WITH YOUR BROTHER-IN-LAW to watch “The Game” and you are sitting there trying to mentally telecast to your husband that YOU! ARE!  NAKED! UNDER! THE! SNUGGIE!! and that they can’t sit down and watch the game because you can’t stand up without it being totally obvious that you are utterly commando even though that is what they are sitting there staring at you expecting to to leave and HOW ARE YOU GOING TO GET OUT OF THE DAMN ROOM WITHOUT YOUR VERY NICE AND INNOCENT BROTHER IN LAW SEEING YOUR CELLULITE RIDDEN ASS?! but then you have no choice but to announce that, “UM. Hi. I am naked under here so could you turn around so I CAN FLEE IN HORROR?!” before you finally get into your bedroom sanctuary trailed by your husband who is laughing his ass off and you and holding your netbook so you can hold the thing standing between you and stripperdom together in the back.

The Snuggie saved us all from mental scarring I am not sure any of us would EVER recover from.

I expect a fruit basket from my brother-in-law’s retinas in thanks.

So, if I were you?

I’d consider purchasing one.

Just sayin’.

I love food.

Let me repeat that.

I LOVE FOOD.

There was a reason that I weighed 300 lbs, y’all.

I am not the healthiest eater on the planet. I tend to love foods that are not so awesome for me to consume. And when I love something, I LOOOOOOVVVVVEEEEEEE it.

Look at my slavish devotion to the 4th food group: Diet Coke.

(And hell YES, it is a food, I don’t care what you say so, PPPFFFTTHHH!!!!!!!.)

I get quite a few emails from people who are passionately concerned about my Diet Coke consumption. (I suppose I ask for this by having my flavicon be a can of Diet Coke.) They tend to range from the “It’s so sweet of you to be concerned” to “OMG,I AM TWO STEPS FROM TAKING OUT A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST YOU, YOU DISTURBING PERSON!” One person sent me custom made pie charts.

Yes, really.

Still, I recognize that I am not getting any younger and my general state of well-being (or not) could probably use an infusion of dietary change.

(No, I am not giving up Diet Coke. It’s my one ingestible vice. Which, thank god because man…with my passion for, um, EVERYTHING I would probably be living under an overpass and sleeping on a urine stained mattress if I were into anything harder. )

It’s not that I hate things that are good for me, I don’t.

In fact, I am an utter foodie at times. One of my friends said it best when she shook her head and bemoaned, “Loralee! You are puzzling. You are the hottest person on the planet, you have this amazing palate and love good food. You find the best dishes at the best restaurants and yet?  YOU EAT LIKE CRAP A DOODLE DOO!” (I may be paraphrasing a little here. Although the part about me being hot is totally, utterly true.)

I am intrigued by certain aspects of eating. Vegan eating just confounds and mystifies me and while I know I could never be that hard core I have a lot of respect for people who adhere to it. And,  I have ALWAYS wanted to eat at a really good Vegan restaurant just…because. I tweeted it one day and “TA DA!” I have a date with the awesome Elisa and Lisa before BlogHer. Lisa is in my boat as far as lurving her cow on a pate, but Elisa has been a practicing Vegan for about 10 years (I think.) Since we’ll be in New York City AND it’s Elisa’s favorite restaurant…I am really excited.

Not only will it be a new experience but hello! FABULOUS COMPANY!

Another area I have been exploring more and more has been buying organic.

I do not agree that ALL organic is always best, so I have been taking my time doing research on what to buy organic and what doesn’t really matter. Buying organic is not that easy to do in little ole’ Logan, Utah, but I have started looking at ways to go about it after INHALING a plate of free-range scrambled eggs that my beesh Victoria made for me on a girl’s weekend in Park City. The difference in taste was staggering and surprising to me.

SO?

I was sold-ish.

I figured that the easiest way to pull this off would be through eating more veggies–and hopefully the lions share would be organically grown.  This is not as easy as it sounds. I love almost ALL vegetables, but my family? Not so much. How ANYONE could be tasting the same HEAVENLY grilled asparagus that I am and make gagging, choking sounds is beyond me.

In case you need a refresher, I am the ONLY inhabitant of the Looney Tunes household that likes tomatoes.

I have a challenge on my hands.

Enter “Field to Families“.

I sit on the board of Social Media Club of Cache Valley with the owner and President and at a meeting he heard my sad little vegetable tale of woe, and kindly offered my friend Kim and I a free run of organic fruit and vegetables shipped in for pickup from California and delivered to locations around Utah for weekly pick up. (Redonkculously cute and useful grocery tote by my fabulous friend, Gretchen:Queen of the quilt and maker of some of the best freaking rolls on the planet.)

(Disclosure: Yes. I got to try out the service for free and yes: I will continue to be a customer. YES I would STILL write this post with or without them. We clear? Super!)

Holy MOLY, people.

I had strawberries in the dead of winter that were heaven on earth.

This produce stays fresh forever and I utterly want to keep using them (If you’re in Utah CHECK them out. They have pickup points around the state. If you’re not in Utah I truly hope someone near you does something similar.) You get an INCREDIBLE amount of fresh produce for $15 bucks. (This is just a portion of it) You can have orders that range to what your family uses and there is an incredible amount of flexibility.

Mainly I was just jazzed to get such awesome produce in the dead of winter.  It was totally worth going to Merlin Olsen park bowery on a Saturday morning with bed head to pick it up.

Uh…I am not sure what I am wanting to do to that broccoli in that last photo but it is OBVIOUS that I need to get laid more often.

Just sayin’…

Kim had a great time picking up her produce as well.

Have you all met Kim? She’s one of my closest friends despite the fact that we are, um…radically different. (I dig radically different people. It makes my life more enriched getting to know them)

This really says it all. (I can’t take her anywhere.)

She is rad.

And tired.

But mainly rad.

Kim is Ms. Crunchy Mama Veggie GURU, so she was right on board with utilizing Field to Families.

After we picked up our produce we got together at her house and made a HUGE freaking dinner for our families.  I won’t overload you with photos but we started out with this and we ended with DIVINE lemon bars. And man…yum.

All in all, I am leaps and bounds ahead of where I was last year. I still consume way too much, um…junk.

But?

I would say this is a pretty decent start.

How about you? Tips? Tricks? Nummy recipes? Sites? Links? Wanna just pipe up and tell me I am super snazzy or that I am slowly rotting my internal organs with Aspartame? Go ahead. Only, be nice. Mean people suck, yo.

xo

P.S. My sincere apologies to everyone for using “laid” and “Broccoli” in the same sentence. I realize the Broccoli is totally innocent and did not deserve such scandalous vocabulary attached to it.

P.P.S. I also don’t really eat Diet Coke and Cheetos for breakfast.

P.P.P.S. For reals.

P.P.P.P.S. Pinkie swear.

P.P.P.P.P.S. Maybe.

:)

“THE  BIG LOVE PHOTO”

(Mad Men Cocktail party- Mom 2.o Summit)

(Start with the one penis in the photo and work your way to the right and back around.)

“Drink in hand, tie in place, I am the lone isle of testosterone in a sea of estrogen.Life is damn, DAMN good.” -Daddy Scratches

“What are these bitches doing in the photo with me? Whatever. I am totally first wife.” -Alice Bradley (Finslippy)

“I love Jesus but I drink a little.” -Joanne Bamberger (PunditMom)

“Dammit! I eliminated the person standing next to me by whacking them in the shins with a crow bar AND YET THEY STILL MAKE ME STAND ON THE END!”- Amy Turn Sharp (little alouette anddoobleh-vay))

“Fuck that guy. Who needs him! Everyone should look at my hair instead. (My hair is very important, y’all)”-Heather Armstrong (dooce)

“I. need. liquor.” -Leah Peterson (Leah Peah)

“OMG!!!!! I can see Russia from my house!!!!!!!”- Loralee (Loralee’s Looney Tunes)

” HOW does this wench with the big hair always end up standing in front of me in EVERY SINGLE PHOTO?! I would do her a favor and tell her that her hair style is SO last season and that she could benefit from highlights, but she’s probably incapable of thinking about anything but Tupperware!”-Susan Wagner (Friday Playdate)

“Susan believes that I am incapable of thinking about anything other than Tupperware and that standing in front of her in every photo is accidental. Little does she know that this is all part of my master plan to take over the WORLD!!! MWUAH-HA-HA-HA!”- Laurie Smithwick (Kirtsy and Leap Design)