I’m a talker. I talk a lot. I also talk FAST. It can really get me into trouble and I can be totally RUDE at times, like not allowing others to get a darn word in edgewise or cutting them off mid-sentence. ARG! The rudeness. I have gotten better at it but me and my yapper embarrass me on a regular basis.
Don’t just go blaming my mouth, either. My brain has quite a bit to do with the disasters that occur. My mind goes about 15 billion MPH. It actually goes much, much faster than my mouth. In fact, when I am saying something my mind is already about six paces ahead of the comment.
At any given moment I am usually thinking about multiple things. I know, this is not unusual at all for a lot of people, (Especially women) but my thought patterns are not pretty and linear like a super highway where multiple lanes twist and curve beautifully together. No, the way my mind and thought patterns process themselves more closely resemble a big jumble of tangled up yarn at the bottom of the yarn basket. It isn’t even just a tangle of yarn, either. The mass also contains a few random knitting needles, stray AA batteries, and probably some Cheeto crumbs sticking to the yarn fuzz. It can be pretty difficult to follow my conversations sometimes. Those who can are to be applauded or institutionalized, I’m not sure which.
Case in point: I was having a delightful conversation with my friend, Michelle. While it is great to have friends that complement your personality because they are different, it is also REALLY nice to have a friend that is a lot like you as well. So, I was going on about how much she would like a friend of mine and how similar they were. Now, in MY head I had a list of things like “They are both very organized, a bit type “A”, accomplished, logical and disciplined. They are both also really funny, tons of fun and appreciate kooky people that are very different from themselves (Which is why they can tolerate me.). I find that it is a bit rare to have these qualities co-exist in a person.
Those are the thoughts I was trying to get across.
Wanna know what came out of my mouth?
“You would totally like this girl, Chelle! She has a great sense of humor and she manages to be amazing without being annoying. She’s on-the-ball, organized, disciplined and logical. Really she is just so much like you except she’s really fun.”
Yah, I’m awesome like that.
I wanted to crawl in a hole and die, but luckily for me and my lame-o mouth, Chelle has a great sense of humor and thought it was hilarious.
Please tell me that other people have said spectacularly stupid things and I’m not alone in my suckiness?