I feel like total shit.

As you may have inferred from that sentence, I am still sick. Very sick. In fact, I can’t remember being this sick for this long without being hospitalized. It’s so frustrating. I was doing better and then a couple of days ago I took a total nosedive.

I’ve gone back to the ER clinic three times. I go there because I am really dehydrated and so I have to get IV’s of saline and they can’t really do that at my doctor’s office. They are all at a loss as to what it is that I have. It may be croup, it may be a form of influenza and they also suspect pertussis, which is the clinical, fancy-dancy name for Whooping Cough. Do you know what it feels like to be tested for Whooping Cough? It’s pretty much the nasal equivalent of an alien anal probe. Not that I’ve been anal probed…by aliens…or anything…Ehem.

I can’t be sick. I have obligations. SINGING obligations and I can barely talk. I hate being this dependent on other people, too. I have been coughing so hard that I vomit, so they put me on some heavy duty cough syrup. It makes coherent communication pretty tough. I’ve pretty much been sleeping for the last two days.

I feel a little better today.  I still can’t really talk on the phone, but I’ve been able to write a few emails and post this, but just writing it has wiped me out, so I’m going to go back to bed.

I just want to get better.

I want my mom.

Sob.