I made a decision that I am starting today. I have shared this with exactly…NO ONE. You’re the first to know. I was scared that I would change my mind and wuss out and I didn’t want to embarrass myself if that happened.
I am giving up Diet Coke.
(WHY, YES! THAT CRACKING SOUND YOU ARE HEARING IS HELL FREEZING OVER!!!!)
I hope you don’t feel mislead by my title or my tweets. Some of you may pooh-pooh this aside as a non-large issue. I know this is not an “I have an alcohol problem” or anything like that but people…
This addiction of mine?
And I have noticed it is getting worse.
When I like something?
I LIKE IT.
I like it a WHOLE LOT.
And there are few things in this world I like as much as Diet Coke.
I drink a staggeringly large amount of it.
I wake up every morning and after I get the baby squared away and the kids are in school and my husband is still getting ready for work/working from home? I go for a drive and get a 44 oz and then do something that makes me utterly happy…I drive around and listen to music.
It’s my “me” time and I have come to dearly love it.
But I’ve noticed that more and more often?
I’ll pick up ANOTHER ONE ON THE WAY BACK HOME.
In the span of 45 minutes.
That means that by the time lunch rolls around, I have often had EIGHTY-EIGHT FREAKING OUNCES OF SODA.
This is embarrassing, much as I love “imbibing in the dark waters”.
I’ve given up Diet Coke once before for 6 weeks. I was hard core. I had no carbonation and no caffeine. I didn’t even take Excederine or eat chocolate. I found that I didn’t really feel any different, I gained weight and I was bored.
Things are a bit different right now.
I drink a lot more of it than I used to.
Diet Coke are my meals more often than not.
Did you catch that? I often DO NOT EAT FOOD, I DRINK DIET COKE. Sometimes I go several meals in a row without eating a thing. I’m a “chain drinker”. I ALWAYS have a Diet Coke.
Since I have a smaller stomach, this means I’m often not hungry for food.
And I have noticed that my meals are getting less and less and my soda consumption is getting more and more.
I take out GARBAGE BAGS FULL OF SODA CUPS.
Right now? As we speak?
This is the table next to me:
(Well, I’m writing this Sunday night for publish tomorrow, so I guess technically it would be: FROM YESTERDAY.)
I get a lot of email from people who are concerned about me. Who spew out that I am poisoning myself and my holy hell, one person even sent me a pie chart of my diminished life expectancy due to Aspartame consumption. (Ok, for the record? Those people piss me off a little.)
But the fact remains that this is just NOT HEALTHY.
I’ve been eying giving it up for a long time. And I made the decision a few weeks ago and haven’t breathed a word of it. I went on a trip and LIVED without waking up and immediately sucking down vats of Diet Coke in the AM. Also…I’m starting with a trainer at a gym today and I just can’t try to get healthier while sucking down vats of carbonation.
I’ve decided to give up all carbonation and just go cold turkey (and it is going to effing suckasuckasuckasuckasuckaSUCK six ways from suckville).
I HAVE to have a safety net and way out of this, though.
I AM GIVING MYSELF UNTIL BLOGHER NYC ’10 (August 6-7) TO SEE HOW IT GOES.
I can’t say forever right now.
I just can’t.
RIDICULOUS as I feel saying it…I’m scared to do this.
This is going to sound incredibly ridiculous, but Diet Coke is just about the best friend I have. (NO offense to my living breathing friends…it’s a metaphor). It is constant. It calms me down. I take an insane amount of pleasure in drinking it.
And I am utterly scared to try to give it up.
The good thing about me, though?
Sometimes I make myself do the things that I am the most terrified of JUST TO PROVE THAT I CAN. I can be pretty stubborn. And I like to prove people wrong. And I know there are a whoooole lot of people who probably think I can’t do this.
But hell’s bells, people…if a girl who is terrified of flying and doesn’t like heights much can do THIS?
(And yes…I am the one looking RIDICULOUS in the goggles that were too tight, weirdo helmet and that is totally my heart JUMPING out of my neck as I watch everyone else on the plane jump before me before screaming “I AM GOING TO DIE” as my jump instructor is shoving me out the door of the plane at THIRTEEN THOUSAND FREAKING FEET. Seriously…why do they make the terrified-of-flying-and-not-fond-of-heights girl JUMP LAST???!)
So, here it goes.
This has been tough for me to write and I am really embarrassed. I’m sure there is a lot to mock in this post, but gosh…I really hope you don’t.
I hope I have your support.
I am going to need it.