** 2/16: She’s awake enough to be talking. This is a very good sign. :)

*Edit: 2/14 I found out that her coma is medically induced. This is good because it means her body didn’t naturally go into one, but it is bad because he seizures were so severe and constant that they had to intubate her and put her into a coma so they would stop. The goal is to be able to bring her out of the coma and then assess where her brain is at and what damage has been done. Fingers crossed.

I got a phone call from my mother while I was trying to wolf down dinner between my dress rehearsal and concert this evening.

My twin sister is at the biggest hospital in Salt Lake City.

She is in the Intensive Care Unit.

She’s in a coma.

Translation: Yes, it’s critical. No, I don’t have any further information than that.

She has many, many neurological disorders and tonight she began seizing and seizing and did not stop.

Whatever is broken in her brain is fine in mine-despite the fact that we are identical.

Being a twin has been hard on both of us our whole lives.

We have a VERY complicated relationship.

You could say that we are estranged.

And yet she shares my DNA.

My face.

Can you ever really be estranged from someone that is a genetic copy of yourself?

It makes all of it worse, somehow.

I am feeling eleventyhundred different things right now. I know that if she pulls through little will probably change between us…it’s a very long story with even longer reasons behind it… but none of that matters at this moment.

I just want her to be ok.

This question is from a recent interview. I liked it so much I wanted to share and ask YOU the same question in return.

Question:

What do you think sets you apart from so many bloggers out there? Why do you think you have succeeded as much as you have online?

Answer:

I’ve had my share of failures along with the things that have worked out, so that is one thing right there-working through and learning when things don’t go as you planned. Like most people will tell you, a lot of online success is simply sticking to it. There’s hard work, luck, networking with other wonderful people and a dose of writing ability that have to occur, too. It also helps if you are able to turn on your computer.

Many people have those qualities so I think my biggest strength is simply the way I think. I have such a wild imagination and my point of view is just odd and entertaining. Being in my head can be like constant partying like it’s 1999 or like the darkest chapters of Grapes of Wrath with a Dante’s Inferno chaser.  Most people could write adequately about the bigger issues in my life, it’s the little day-to-day stuff that will bite you.

I’m good at making boring, little things and moments interesting because THAT IS HOW I SEE THEM in my head.

I wasn’t planning on blogging today but something happened this morning that I have GOT to jot down so that I always remember when, where and how it happened.

Aaron is 8.5 months and has been babbling and making sounds for a long time. His favorite, like most babies because of the ease of it, has been the “D” sound. And like most parents, when he started babbling we started talking back to him while making silly and ridiculous faces to encourage him to speak and form words. The main goal has been to get him to add the “D” at the end of “Da” and today he DID IT!

AARON SAID HIS FIRST WORD!

DAD!

NOT “d, d, d, d”

NOT “da, da, da, da, da”

D-A-D!

(Or more accurately, “D-A-DT“. The little voiceless retroflex plosive “T” at the end of the word just slays me with cute.)

We just had our morning bath and I was lotioning and giving him his baby massage and chattering and grinning at him when he blinked at me with those big, huge eyes, grinned, and said, “DADt”!

It startled me and wasn’t totally sure I heard correctly, so I grinned and said, “DAD”, back.

AND HE REPEATED IT!!!

THREE TIMES!

I then excitedly ran and dragged a naked and dripping Jonathan out of the shower so he could witness the awesomeness that was his kid.

Not to be indelicate but I think Butterlump suffers from performance anxiety. He just sat there blinking at Jon and then tried to suck the water droplets off his arm. I didn’t want him to feel bad so I told him it’s ok. It happens to all guys at some point.

Heh.

Poor, Jonathan. He didn’t even get to hear his own name.

BUT I DID!!!

I am so uber thrilled that I don’t even care that my son thinks I’m a dude. (I am used to it. I have always thought I look man-like. And hell, I have played enough of them on stage, so ya know…I’m chill with it.)

Thanks for letting me squee with excitement on you all. I know this is my fourth baby but it’s been such a long road and we haven’t had a little baby in the house in so very long that it is all JUST as magical as the first time for me.

Maybe even more because with age and a whole lot of trial, grief and loss I realize JUST how precious and fleeting it all really is.