Aaron has his 1st tooth!
A tooth at 3.5 months?!
SERIOUSLY?
I’m torn between being totally proud and putting my head down on my desk and crying that it is going by TOO FAST, DAMMIT.
This whole baby thing is the best gig in the world, people.
For reals.
P.S. Speaking of teeth, it’s been QUITE the tooth adventure around the Looney Tunes household this week. I broke my tooth in half. One minute I am innocently eating a handful of Quaker Oatmeal Squares like a mindless bovine and the next I am hitting the ceiling in rabid, searing tooth pain. Damn those Quakers. They preach a good game of peace and harmony but the sneaky little bastards will get you EVERY time.
P.P.S. After much angst and bitching and moaning on Twitter I am finally getting a root canal in the morning. I am on enough pain killers to floor an elephant. If I die, I leave my bra collection to the girls of Room 704. They know why. :)
P.P.P.S. I am speaking at tonight’s Social Media Club of Cache Valley meeting. 6:30pm, Club New York. It’s going to be a blast, people. (Especially with that whole, “Being on enough painkillers to floor an elephant thing. Heh) Show up! I’d love to meet you.
P.P.P.P.S. Thank you to everyone who commented on my last post about the closure I’ve gotten with my college boyfriend. Not only did enough of you pipe up that I didn’t feel like an inadequate blogger in front of an ex (always important, you know) but you were all lovely about it. Sometimes readers and commenters on blogs that belong to writers of the female gender can get FIERCELY protective of the author, especially when the topic involves anything to do with those of the penis-wielding, testosterone-filled variety. ESPECIALLY if they are of the ex-boyfriend type.
P.P.P.P.P.S. Not to imply that my ex-boyfriend was penis-wielding when we dated. That makes it sound like he was some rapist or something. Which he wasn’t!!!!!!!!!!
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Ok, but that last statement ALSO makes it sound like there was ZERO penis-wielding going on, which COULD imply that he is gay and/or I am wildly unattractive and resemble a dude. So, yeah…there was a TINY bit penis-wielding happening in good ole’ Richard’s Hall.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. And just because I put “Tiny” and “Penis” in the same sentence is in NO WAY indicative of…um…size. NOT that I would really know about that or anything.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. (JESUS, I AM SINKING DEEPER AND DEEPER INTO A TOTAL CLUSTERBOMB OF INAPPROPRIATE OVER HERE!! Send help. Also, throw in some Diet Coke, power bars and $1,000 bucks in unmarked bills to live on in the HUGE FREAKING HOLE I am digging to bury myself in.)
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Um…can we just forget about this whole ‘Penis’ thing and hug it out? Seriously, just forget you read anything. ESPECIALLY if you are my parents, people I went to high school with or an uber-religious type who might be tempted to classify me as one worthy to be stoned and/or called to repentance before I face the flaming hot fires of Beelzebub. Or whatever.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Although, I guess hijacking a perfectly respectable “mommy blog” post about your baby’s first tooth and turning it into a discussion about your ex-boyfriend’s penis probably really does qualify me for a seat by the fire.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. The way I think hurts my head. Sigh…I accept my fiery fate.
P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P.P. S’more’s, anyone?
hm, hugging it out with someone who used a post about their baby’s first tooth to somehow work in info on an ex’s non-tiny penis? sure! arms wide open, sending a virtual hug!
mmm,s’mores.
You took two topics that have NOTHING to do with each other and made it work. You deserve a case of Diet Coke for that.
“S’mores, anyone?”
Made me laugh out loud. You rock, funny lady. :-)
Hope your tooth feels better soon. And I’m so sorry to hear that Aaron is teething already! My grandmother swears up and down that my 3.5-month-old is teething, but I am ignoring that, as my 2-year-old is currently teething right now himself and I CANNOT deal with two kids teething at once. Cannot.
Have fun tonight!
Hehehehe you said “penis…”
(I am totally 12…)
Tell me about it! My little guy is cutting one, too at not even 5 months. Craziness! Sorry I haven’t emailed you back yet. I still need to talk to my mom about a time. I haven’t forgotten. I’m just pokey.
19 P’s. I counted, just to prove I can still count at my advanced age. I’d tell you you’re funny as hell, but A) everyone is already telling you that, 2) it’ll just blow your head up to proportions where it won’t be able to fit through the doorframe anymore and Tres) there is no tres, plus Quatre) I have a total blog crush now.
e) Good luck with the elephant-killing tooth drugs
6) You should know he’ll need to get bailed out at 5am. It’s always 5am. Trust me on that.
VII) You won’t have gotten to sleep the night before until 3:30, so you’ll be none too pleased.
Uhm… If I already decided well before this post that you were “one worthy to be stoned and/or called to repentance before you face the flaming hot fires of Beelzebub” do I have to retract my previous judgements cuz you made me laugh? I just want to know what I’m up against if I want to continue being your friend and all… ; )
Oh, and the tooth would explain last week’s weeping and wailing, eh? For both of you, I think.
WHAT are you feeding that kid?
And I’d have s’mores with you anytime, anywhere. Devil be damned.
Freaking hilarious you are. Yeah, I’m kind of talking like Yoda…been around my kids too much ;)
So, root canal tomorrow probably means you don’t want to hang out..call me.
Love the tooth…he has 1 more than Libby, yeah, seriously.
Yer funny. I wish I could write about a penis in a blog post. But I just…can’t. Not because I’m a prude…or am I? But I mean, my mom reads it. Sometimes.
I, as a Quaker, can say that we are sneaky people. Well, not all of us, but some of us.
Oh, my mom reads my blog. And cringes and dies a little inside a lot of the time, I am sure.
I TRY to tell her we will BOTH be much happier if she just doesn’t, but…ya know. :)
Chelle,
You is my fave person…you can do whatever the hell you want at this point. You have totally earned it, friend. :)XOOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOOXXOOXOXOOXOXOOXOX
And YES…THIS EFFING HURTS. :*( (See that little emoticon tear I added for sincerety n’ stuff???)
@Jamie
SO glad I did not piss off the Quakers. (Like I need one more black mark, ya know???)
My son went to bed with no teeth at 4 months old and woke up with FOUR. He’s an extreme teether.
Sorry about your tooth. And I think it’s funny when people talk about penises.
Wow. -that’s a comment about your P.P.S.’s
Wow. At least your not breastfeeding.
-and that’s about your cute baby part of the post.
Youch – to both the baby and you! I broke a tooth in a similar way a few years ago (although no Quaker cereal was involved) and now have a shiny gold one replacing it. (I am a gangster.)
But the real impetus to drag me out of lurkerdom – I’m wondering what else went on at Richards Hall. When I was there (in 1994-95), I didn’t see any penis-wielding…
This post went bad FAST and I love it. Peanut is 5 1/2 months and still doesn’t have any teeth. Since she is breastfed and she eats ALL THE DAMN TIME GIVE ME A BREAK KID! and she’s kinda sassy I bet she would nurse without hurting me and then once I got comfortable she would chomper down on my nipple. I’m so looking forward to it. Oh, and PENIS PENIS PENIS.
I’m not going to read the other reply’s about this whole junk/wang/happy parts thing. But… yeah… you really should not go onto the “anyone can read this regardless” computer thing and suggest anything about a man’s stuff. I know it was unintended, but in a way you brought it all around to that. I still love you, but for the “lesser” of us I think you should refrain when it come to certain subjects.
P.S. would 7½ refer to the “lesser of us”?
Just wanna know where i stand..
XOXO
I also forgot to mention that I’m single and live in Seattle. And that I’m drunk and feel like being a total pain in the ass.
Well if there are any inquiries, you know where to direct them
Trent-
LOL.
Dude, you can be a pain in my ass ANY time.
Which could be taken to be way pervier than intended….
SEE????! IT JUST HAPPENS, YO!!!
Hee.
xoxoxo
I love you.
That is all.
I have to delurk to say:
If you ended up in Hell, I can only see you eyeballing Satan and saying “Move, Bay-itch” and he’d pee as he fled from your awesomeness.
Good luck with all the teething, and pass the smores, babe.
Once you say “penis” you can’t take it back.
The s’mores comment is PRECISELY why I love this blog. Thank you for being so unequivocally you, Loralee.
cracking up here. ’nuff said.
Mmm, smores! ;p
Awww, teething!
…p3n1s!
You are lovely, wonderful, and hilarious.
x
Supa