So, when you publish a post that is all judgy-judy and rant-rant-ranty about huge families you MAY want to remember before it goes to publish that one of the loveliest women on the EARTH that reads your blog and sends you lovely fan mail n’ stuff has FOURTEEN CHILDREN. And 10 of them are adopted and 5 have special needs (i.e. chicka is a total and complete AMAZING woman and even manages to have amazing non-polygamy hair while doing so!)
She was so lovely to me as I emailed a warning and an apology and sputtered and tried to explain that I just did NOT put her family in the same box. (Hell, I would love it if they could have the help, the cash the tax breaks, etc. She is giving those kids an amazing chance.) Her being so lovely back was the only reason I could sleep!
And then she goes and writes one of the nicest posts ever written. ABOUT ME. Even though I criticized a situation that while really different is not unlike her own. I know hers is a different situation but like I want to make her life HARDER, ya know?
SHE IS AMAZING. (Seriously, I kinda want to show up on her doorstep pretending to be 12 and see if she’ll adopt ME.)
Go say hello. Please? If only to make me feel like less of an asshat. :)
Filed under: 
Dude I totally popped over to her blog when I saw her sweet comment. She is a cool lady. and you are a rockstar. and today I totally told two friends about polygamy hair and they were all like “omg I know what you mean”
I don’t think you should feel bad, simply because her case is different from the cases in the prior post. Here’s the thing: in life, we use generalizations and stereotypes and boxes and pigeonholes as TOOLS for understanding the world around us. They are not meant to fit every situation to a T. That is why they are called generalizations and not specifications, eh? Life is a big collection of gray area, so everything has to be evaluated case by case. Generalizations are tools to help us understand, but particulars of individual cases must be considered when making final judgments. (BTW, judgment is not a bad word. Shotgun judgment is, but judgment based on careful consideration is natural, useful, and part of being human. Your post handled that just fine.) As I’m learning about the law in preparation for entering law school this fall, I have realized that you may have two cases that look very similar that have different outcomes, and that is because the details matter. So don’t beat yourself up about this, aight?
Dude. Chill. She’s totally different and also? Added to my feed reader. I like her already.
First off her situation is totally different so you don’t have to feel like a douchebag. The biggest difference is that most of her children are adopted, which I completely admire while those other families are just bringing huge numbers of children into an already overcrowded world. My biggest pet peeve about some of these families is why don’t they adopt or foster if they want so many kids?
Second, BRAVO to you for hitting the nail on the head regarding the hoopla surrounding these mega families. I soo agree with all you said right down to how it would be nice to cut everything from that crazy chick who just had 8 but it would really just hurt the kids. How sad!
Loralee,
If you even think about beating yourself up, I want to come over and watch.
Just kidding you crazy.
You know how much I love you and if I had my way, I would be gathering up those eight babies to adopt them too. I love kids, I love the chaos, AND they keep me out of trouble. I truly have no time to cause any shit. So, you know it helps me stay on the right path.
Thank you again for the fantastic email and internet love. :)
Brandon is all worried now about “Girl Crushes.” I may have to do a post on that.
I think there is a total difference between being a parental rockstar and adopting children and those with special needs than treating your body like you’re on a breeding farm.
She deserves major kudos for opening her heart and her home to those children.
Duggars and octomom? Creepy and selfish come to mind. Yeah, I said it!
There is nothign wrong with expressing opinions on your blog, people who read will understand.
That octomom makes me so darn mad! I agree with Angela in the above comment, “Creepy and selfish come to mind”…
Polygamy. Now THERE’s an idea. I should move to Utah, I think. And Sandi is, it would seem, just like you – a treasure.
You’re a sweetheart :)
I’m off to visit her now! AND I agree there is a HUGE difference between having 14 kids by IVF and adopting, which is actually giving children who ALREADY EXIST a new life and love, not bringing a child into the world who you can’t take care of.