As many of you know, I live in Utah.
Utah?
Is one of the most un-diverse places in the planet.
Now, now, fellow Utahans, before you get your knickers in a twist and berate me, I LOVE MY STATE. I stay here deliberately because it’s pretty gosh darn, freakin’ awesome ‘possum! Plus the mountains are pretty and I dig fry sauce and funeral potatoes.
(In fact, I’m going to be consuming some funeral potatoes today after funeral #2 of the week. Not exactly what you would call a party, but it will be nice to see my family, even if it is for my uncle’s funeral. This would also be why I am up at at ass crack of dawn writing to you all. I can only subject you to that douchebag from Wife Swap for so long,)
But, doood! As much as you may love The Beehive State, you totally have to admit that as far as diversity goes, we are the land of milk minus the honey. Unless it’s really white honey with blond hair and blue eyes. I will say that since I was a kid it is getting much, much better in Salt Lake and the Wasatch Front, it really is. However, I do not live in the Wasatch Front, I live an hour north of it, and while the Latin American population in Cache Valley is doing fairly well and we do have in influx of international students from Utah State University, it is still pretty freaking homogenized. (We ARE known for our dairy products, don’t ya know.)
It’s probably my biggest regret about living here. I long for more diversity. I really do. I love different cultures and being with different people and points of view. It’s one reason why I love and live kind of vicariously through the Internet. It’s one reason why I MUST GET OUT OF UTAH from time to time. To further that, I MUST ESCAPE CACHE VALLEY from time to time, even though I love it here.
Some of you may also know I am in an amazing and HUGE choir.
We are also the whitest choir on the planet. (Not that that is bad, just…ya know, it’s the truth and result of where I reside.)
I was in a concert on Saturday night.
It was in celebration of the 200th birthday of Lincoln, the 100th anniversary of the NAACP, Presidents Day, and a hat tip to the historically amazing event of inaugurating our first African American President. (No. I didn’t vote for him. I didn’t vote for the other guy, either. Frankly, I don’t care who you voted for, you HAVE to acknowledge the sheer historical significance of it, if nothing else.) There were American folk songs, patriotic numbers, spirituals, The Fanfare for the Common Man, hot men in uniform presenting the colors and an AMAZING video choreography about the Civil War that showed on three huge screens while Senator Bob Benett narrated “The Lincoln Portrait”.
Honestly? It was one of the most amazing things I have ever participated in.
I cried on stage like a baby.
CRIED.
ON THE FREAKING STAGE.
LIKE A FREAKING BABY.
(Speaking of freaking baby-GOOD NEWS! WE DECIDED WHAT WE ARE NAMING OUR SON. It hit me like a sledge hammer while I was on stage CRYING LIKE A BABY and I absolutely, positively know what his name is supposed to be. I imagine this is what people feel like when they have prayers answered. I just know what it is. And no, it is not Jack. I didn’t let go of that easily, either. Trust me. Actually, it isn’t any name I’ve mentioned or that we have discussed. Now for the BAD NEWS! I’m not telling you what it is, yet. We’re still pounding out his middle name. If he even has one. Mean of me, huh? I’m kinda bitchy like that.)
I think my favorite part of the concert was the gospel soloist that flew in to sing with us.
First off, she was adorable. At our one and only rehearsal with her she said, “I just want to thank all y’all fine classical singers for letting this old, round, brown gospel singer sing with y’all.”
Then she opened up her mouth and rocked my world. She probably broke every singing “Rule” on the planet and I did.not.care. It was AAMAAAAAZING.
I love gospel music.
You may be surprised to know many spirituals and just HOW much gospel I have sung in my life.
Tons of it. Tons and TONS of it.
I can’t help wanting to sing them because dude, my money notes are all low and in my chest and you cannot get better music for it than the spirituals. I also have been in choirs where the directors lllllovvveeee to perform gospel selections. I am not sure if it is true love or just trying to bring in some diversity. Either way works, I love it. I think one of my favorite pieces is “The Gospel Mass” and I’ve done it at LEAST five times.
THAT SAID.
Unless it has been a situation where we are working with multiple diverse choirs from across the country, I end up cringing a lot, even though I love the music and we have a “pretty” sound.
Most of the times I end up thinking, “WOW! This is a great song. ”
I ALSO end up thinking, “WOW! This choir is waaaay too white to be singing it.”
I’ve worked with gospel choirs over the years but my first experience with working with an amazing gospel soloist was when Reverend Jesse Jackson’s daughter, Santita, came in sing in a concert of SENATOR ORRIN HATCH’S MUSIC.
Yeah. I know.
I could write about the sheer weirdness of that situation for days but I will leave it at the fact that it was…interesting. Oh, and Orrin really needs to wear different ties. And write better music. (Crap, that was out loud, wasn’t it??)
However, SHE was amazing. Her voice was amazing. It made the whole night amazing.
Well, one part? Was NOT amazing.
I was eight months pregnant with Christopher and due to hyperemesis, sick as a dog. (Are we seeing a theme here? Knocked up, barfing, senators, and gospel singers? Yeah, me too.) I was so sick that they stood me on the end of the row next to the wing in case I had to go barf. Although the heat of the lights was killing me and I was queasy as hell, I did ok and really thought I could make it to the end.
Santita was great.
During one of the closing songs she said, “There is nothing in the world as beautiful as an expectant mother. I want this beautiful expectant mother to come stand next to me while I sing this song.”
AND SHE TURNED AROUND AND STARTED POINTING.
AT ME.
I WAS “BEAUTIFUL EXPECTANT MOTHER.”
UHHHHH????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I gave my director a frantic look of, “WHAT THE HELL?” and he just shrugged and gave me a look of “Eh? Go with it????” , so off I went to the center of the stage to join Miss Jackson. (Yeah, I felt pretty ‘nasty’ at the moment so it’s acceptable to call her that. Sorry, I just couldn’t help the musical pun. heh.)
The song was, “Put your arms around the world”, which was ironic as she had her arms around me and I was pretty much the size of the world at that point.
She started swaying with the music, taking me and my VERY VOMITOUS STOMACH WITH HER.
All I could think was, “OMG! I AM GOING TO VOMIT! I AM GOING TO VOMIT ON THE FRUIT OF REVERAND JESSEE JACKSON’S LOINS!! AND THEN I WILL BE ARRESTED FOR ASSAULT!!! AND IT WILL PROBABLY BE LISTED AS A HATE CRIME!!!! “
I have a vivid imagination, people.
I survived, but walked away wishing that I had pipes like that.
I felt the same way Saturday listening to “Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen”. The audience went WILD. I think 99% of them have listened to that song before but I am willing to bet that before that moment very few of them had actually HEARD IT. They were used to hearing it from choirs from Utah. NOTHING like that.
I know that there are lots of amazing jazz musicians that are white, I do.
BUT, MAN. I am telling you, for that kind of music?
It just is not the same. It’s NOT.
I don’t know if it is genetic encoding like when salmon just know how to swim upstream but when an African American that can really sing, sings those numbers? THEY JUST KNOW and you KNOW they know. It is unlike anything. You FEEL the meaning behind it.
I totally hope that if I am ever reincarnated I get to come back as a gospel singer WITH SOUL. Seriously, it would rock my world to be able to sing like that. And since I think that black women are beeeoooootttiful, looking like that would also rock. I also fess up to having booty envy. I am so tired of pancake butt. So, on top of the singing, I would also like to have a better ass this next time around, ok? I am tired of my pants falling down.
Actually, if there is something you could do about that NOW, it would be awesome, too.
So, please, whoever is in charge of all that reincarnation stuff? Pretty please? Can I?
(Oh, and if I could be as disgustingly pretty as Heather B., that would also be appreciated. Kthnxbai!)
P.S. I am a little bit freaked (as I am wont to be with the internet) that someone, somewhere is going to consider something in here to be racist. It is the complete opposite of my intentions, so if I said something that offends, blame my stupidity and poor writing skills instead of intent, m’kay?
P.P.S. This post did not take the turn I was intending. I really was just going to write about the choir I am in and the concert and provide links but then I considered that this particular group may not want to be associated with a post that talks about vomiting on the fruit of Jesse Jackson’s loins, so I’m not going to mention the organization or its awesome director by name.
P.P.P.S. Mmm…funeral potatoes…mmm…
glad you had a good time
wish we could hear you sing
arent people great
I find it hard to believe that you covet another person’s pipes. (*giggle*)
I think it’s amazing that you are in a choir and wish I could sing, period! I guess we all have someone to look up to and something to work towards.
And potatoes, mmmm… Now I’m sitting here wondering what the heck funeral potatoes are.
I have pondered similar things before. . . When we lived in Houston, I was in an LDS Stake choir wherein we sang some gospel songs. Now, you might think that being in HOUSTON, TEXAS, there would have been a lot of black people in the stake or the choir, but that was not the case. There was one black family in our ward, and I think one or two black ladies in the stake choir.
As we sang “all of God’s chillun (the white director made us say it that way) got shoes” I really wondered if it was appropriate for us to be singing that. I felt kind of weird about it.
I love gospel music. I used to live across from a Baptist church and the music that would come out of there drew me to my window to dance.
Well I can’t imagine anyone thinking you’re racist. YOu are saying how beautiful someone is and how you love a type of singing. You are recognizing that one group of people are naturally better than others.
Would it be hateful if I said, “Tall people are better at basketball than shorties. In general, not specific to any one person.”? I hope not.
And, I love all you had to say.
It’s an opinion my daughter shared in moving from Vegas to Portland: my goodness, where did all the black people go? Why is everybody at the coffee shop (store, bakery, library) plain white? Perhaps it’s the side of town she is on, but down here in her third grade classroom she would have kids from a dozen different countries.
I don’t think that it’s anywhere near racist to admire a culture for something that they seem to be particularly talented at. Some races are just naturally predisposed to be better at some things than others. While it kind of is a stereotype, you’re not speaking of the entire race, and it’s a good stereotype…. It’s not like you’re saying that you admire some random gang banger’s ability to walk about of an electronics store with a tv completely undetected… LOL. *That?* That would be racist.
Anyway – I get exactly what you’re saying. The way some of those women sing is just SO inspirational – it’s hard not to say something.
Oh, and I’m glad you didn’t throw up on Jesse Jackson’s daughter. :)
Our diversity level has actually been kicked up a little post hurricane Katrina. It’s kind of weird that now it’s NOT unusual to see black people in Salt Lake. It’s still not as common as, say, Chicago, but it’s not as rare as the White Buffalo either.
Have you ever listened to Dee Daniels? She’s a jazz singer with about a 4 octave range, and I went to hear her concert a few years ago, and at one point my jaw literally fell open from her singing. She is incredible. Check her out.
The whole evening was great, but Pamela Laws was absolutely the high-point for me. She could sing, and you could feel what she was singing, but more than anything I wanted to sit on the couch and talk with her. She was so adorable on stage, the way she interacted with the audience and the rest of the choir, that I felt like I just had to get to know her better. I loved it.
All I got from this post was appreciation of a type of music that’s generally associated with a particular culture. No racism here, nuh-uh. ;-)
Reminds me of the time the jazz choir I sang with performed at a veterans event singing patriotic stuff.
It was the only time I ever cried in the middle of a song right there on stage and it was the most powerful feeling ever.
Several veterans in the audience, who were very old (some even in wheel chairs) struggled to stand up then they saluted while we sand god bless america.
The sheer determination and love they displayed was enough to make me cry like a baby. Choir can be such a powerful thing.
I love gospel music too and am also too white for it.
Loving funeral potatoes and gospel music and disliking living in a white, white world. I am with you in all of it. (I live just a teeny bit north of you in white Idaho).
But since you have sung on choirs in Utah, did you have the privilege of working with Bruce and Linda Walker? They taught my kids choir for years and are incredibly awesome choir directors and they recently spent 2 years directing choirs there in Utah.
I just had to ask, since if you worked with them, you most likely love them too. And then, see, we’d have another thing in common.
Mary, mom to 10, only 4 of whom are the pale variety :)
Some of the things that ran through my head as I read this post…
I think it should be mandatory for people (especially LDS people) born and raised in Utah to move away from Utah for at least 4 years to experience some of the diversity you crave. It would help some people to become more open-minded and realize that just because someone has a BAD HABIT or is (gasp) gay they are NOT a BAD PERSON. Need an example? A friend of mine who is LDS and was raised in Kansas went to BYU, where one of her roomates was someone that I went to H.S. with who was also LDS and born and raised in Utah. The girl from Utah had the audacity to tell my friend that members of the church who aren’t from Utah just don’t really know what the church is all about. If anything? It’s the other way around. (No one get offended, I am LDS and I was born and raised in Utah, and this is my experience with being born and raised LDS in Utah, and having moved away and seen some of the country)
Also, I think it’s AWESOME that you’re not telling the name you’ve picked for your baby. I got so tired of telling the SAME people almost EVERYDAY what names we were considering for our first, after him it has been a tightly guarded secret. If anyone asked, I would tell them some stupid name like Festus and have fun with their reaction.
And finally, sounds like a great choir. I was in the institute choir in college and I LOVED it. I really miss singing. And you’re right, black people just have more soul and can sing the gospel songs better than white people. The concert sounds like it was amazing, I wish I could have been there.
On the note of being too white- I was in a church choir in a city that is a large suburb of Seattle and populated with 99% families of people who work at Microsoft. We were a good choir, very talented musically, but totally sucky at things like clapping in rhythm and swaying to the beat while singing. Our director actually had to direct us as to which direction to sway, to avoid the horrible spectacle of 150 white people crashing into each other and knocking one another off the risors.
Good times.
Oh, and if Festus is the name you picked for your baby, I was just kidding about it being a stupid name.
it’s great.
really.
As a white person married to a brown person, I have learned to appreciate being white. I think sometimes we lean so far over backwards NOT to be racist that we try too hard to demean ourselves while complimenting others. I grew up in a very liberal area just after the civil rights era. As a child the message I got was that white people were guilty of every evil committed against humanity and that I should feel guilty about that. I remember feeling ashamed of the Germanic side of my family. I was embarrassed to tell any of my black friends that my Dad had southern roots.
I went into my marriage eager to experience diversity first hand. I felt that including another culture into my life as a married woman and future mother would be enriching. I was crushed when I found my in-laws to be far more racist and unwelcoming than my very conservative ultra wasp (not to mention highly educated, SF bay area!) parents. It was an eye opener to me, for sure!
I have spent the majority of my life in areas that were culturally diverse. I have enjoyed that. I have always been interested in getting to know those who are different from me. I have also learned that no culture is perfect. Dealing with the negatives of another culture taught me to appreciate my own.
I am aware of a lot of the cultural norms found in Utah. I am not sure I would like living there but I totally love visiting that beautiful state. Those mountains take my breath away. The times when I have been there on vacation, I have had great experiences among the people that I met. One thing I especially appreciate is the Utahns tolerance of children. It is a great place to visit as a family as they seem to accept that kids will be kids sometimes.
Enough of my ramblings. Just wanted to share my perspective.
Oh and btw, I like gospel music as well!
your link for heather b isn’t working. unless she is nopasanada.com and selling her domain name.
i didn’t take your post as racist at all! not a bit.
Laughing at you during homework time does not help the children stay focused.
Laughing in a good way.
btw-I love you.
OK Ladybug, you have to tell me what “funeral potatoes” are?
Also, for the name I am going to say, either, Abraham, Lincoln, or Aaron(Copeland).
I have always wanted to be able to sound like Mahalia Jackson, so I know what you are talking about!
Ok, “The fruit of Jesse Jackson’s loins” had me dying of laughter. You are one of the funniest people. i’ve been reading through your archives all day. even though you told us not to and I have been laughing and crying. I should move to Utah by you because I have a feeling that you are one of the most interesting people out there! I’m so glad that “douchebag” from wife swap “introduced” us!
btw-the link to Heather B. is not working. I wanted to check her out. not in a sexual way or anything, ya know, er, ok I will shut up now!
You people crack me up and make me want to hug you all at the same time. I just got back from THE longest day, so I’ll be back because I have stuff I want to say, I just have to curl up in the fetal position for a little bit.
I fixed the link to Heather B’s site. I always forget it’s .org and not .com. She is an AMAZING writer and doood…I think she is so freaking pretty. When I met her at BlogHer, I kept staring at her out of the corner of my eye and sneaking peaks when she wasn’t looking. I’m totally glad she was really into her cup of wine in the Styrofoam Starbucks cup because if she had caught me staring at her she would have definitely thought I was a bisexual stalker.
She’s just purdy, people. I pink puffy heart her.
P.S. Funeral potatoes are a casserole style side dish that can be made different ways but it always consists of potatoes, cheese, onion, sour cream and usually a topping made out of butter, cheese and cornflakes. It’s also usually served with ham and 99% of the family after-funeral luncheons you attend in Utah serve ham and funeral potatoes because it is an easy dish to serve a lot of people. And Utah? Is known for BIG FAMILIES.
Mine is no exception. My mom is the youngest of 8. I”m the youngest of 6 and my mom had the smallest family. So? Use your imagination about just how many people were fed today.
So tired. Back laters.
Loralee- You crack me the hell up every time I read you!
I miss Utah, for the funeral potatoes and the fry sauce. That’s about it! I had to move my nine Black children out of there, because they stood out like raisins in a bowl of rice pudding.
I was worried about them growing up there. It’s a great place, but not so great when you are the token black kid in everything!
I loved your post. I love pregnant tummies too. I was glad to hear I am not the only person that thinks they are the most beautiful thing in the world!
Thanks for the explanation of funeral potatoes. I was wondering if they were just buried in something!
BTW-how was the funeral? I hope it wasn’t too rough on you.
Daughter has had the opportunity to sing Gospel with a few of the most renowned artists I know. Her favourite memory of all her choral experiences was singing an African spiritual song while standing on Robbin Island where Mandela was imprisoned with their sister choir Mascato. She said it literally brought people to their knees weeping.
Her second favourite she just now reminded me was a tour to SLC where they performed in Assembly Hall ( as the Tabernacle was undergoing renos) and they sang one of their African pieces and shook the makeshift stage with their dance. It shocked, surprised, enthralled and amazed the “white-bread” audience. We laughed for 1/2 the trip back to Alberta that it was a good thing it had happened in SLC where those good old saints were praying for the stage to stay up.
I am thrilled that you had that opportunity. Say what you will about the world, music unites us all on a totally different plane….
I left Texas 20 years ago with my husband to work at the INEL in Idaho. I remember thinking this is not right, where did everyone else go. Then about a year later we went out to eat in the one and only resteraunts in town and I was almost giddy at the prospect of being seated next to a black couple who were visiting the area.
That’s when I knew I missed living and visiting all my family in the deep south and needed to leave. Okay SanDiego Japan San Fransico and the Ukraine are extreme in change but now I’m in DC go figure.
As for the January 21st, I lived here and understood how horrificly cold and congested this place would be. I really can’t fathom how you held up, God Bless you. I left and went sking at Whitetail. To bad I missed you, I’m going to go dig up a recording now.
I like your wit. Congradualations on the Baby Boy? So.. have to ask are the names Luther Abraham Lincoln King?
I enjoyed this post! Your conversational direction is alot like mine!! I followed it effortlessly! LOL!
Can I just say that you make me laugh SO HARD. I don’t know you, I can’t even remember how I found your blog, but you are the real deal. My heart grows and expands as a human being whenever I read what you share; you articulate my grief on days I simply can’t. You nail the normal moments/feelings of life and cut through the crap. This post was no exception. DANG FUNNY. And so real. Thanks for sharing your humanity with the blogging world.
Oh OK, similar to AuGratin or maybe Scalloped potatoes. Being of Irish ancestry, I just had to know about those potatoes. We are kind of obsessed with all things potato. LOL!
Condolences on your uncle.
Gosh, I know the names of the choir AND your fetus…I must be “just a little bit special.” (Name that tune and artist…OK, just the artist as the title is the last four words of the quote.)
I spoke with Ms. Laws after the concert, and she was just as nice as she’d been at rehearsal and during the concert. She said that she wasn’t responsible for her voice. She said she actually couldn’t hear what it was that would make people want to ask her to sing, and she said it without mock modesty. It was as if she were commenting on the current weather conditions.
I’m glad the evening went so well. That moment of silence just before the concert musta done something…focus, at least…
I can’t wait to hear the name! I don’t blame you for not telling. I never told either. If you tell, someone will always tell you why they don’t like a particular name. People are more likely to shut-up when you have already named the baby.
Have I ever told you I have a list of 17 names for girls, and I don’t even know that I’m having kids at all?
I have a name thing, wherein I want to name 17 kids, but not actually birth, feed, and college 17 kids. Also: I have two boy names on my (non)list. Which of course means if I ever did decide to have kiddos, I would have all boys, and they would run around barefoot and nameless.
Sorry I asked. I was wonder when you stood on the mall and it hit you was it the ones a immediately thought of.
I’ll patiently wait out of curiosity.
@Katherine
I’m just getting online for the day and I didn’t mean to ignore any questions I just have my hands a bit full with the craziness that is moderating the comments on my post about Wife Swap. :)
I wasn’t at the inauguration (although that would have been cool. And COLD. I have performed in DC in January and MAN…that cold goes RIGHT THROUGH YOU) This was a concert held here in Logan on Jan.31.
As soon as we have the middle name settled we’re going to announce his name right here. I’m excited for it but feel that it all needs to be “In place” before we make it official. :)
I’m done with the Brit in SF! Sorry you have to moderate that so much.
I read your post and just assumed it was DC since everyone else seemed to be here. And those are the first 4 names that popped into my brain quite literally.
Love Logan Utah Spent my 1968 summer there at the Holiday Inn, while my dad did some of his gov’t coarse training thing there.
you crack my ass up. This post helped me make it through an otherwise gloomy day. you’re a hoot! thanks!!
Having grown up in KY, I know what you mean about the lack of cultural diversity (color) here. It IS here, you just have to look a little harder. Fortunately my children are color blind. My grandchildren are all biracial–mixes of white, native american, black, and hispanic. Our family is becoming a wonderful rainbow of love.
When I was telling people that I had plans to come out there their opinions generally fell towards, “What the fuck?” One person said to me that the only other black people in SLC play for the Jazz. Me and Karl Malone. And I think expressed this fear to you, Sarah and Bishop Deal and you all understood, which I appreciated immensely. So what I’m failing miserably at saying is that I’m actually looking forward to coming to Utah. It will be like Upstate NY but a touch whiter. I’m ok with that.
Also, y’all should let Loralee sing in your ear while you are possibly drunk and drinking wine out of a paper coffee cup. She’s really good. And not because I was drunk but because…DAMN…she’s amazing.
Hi there. I “lurk” on your blog quite a bit and I just wanted to comment to day about diversity…
I was in the gospel choir in high school. I was the only white girl and I loved it! I also sing in church and it’s pretty white.
ANY-hoo I agree that gospel music just pierces you right to your soul! And I don’t really know many white girls that can sing it the right way ya know?
I TRY but.. meh. I’m white so ya know, I kinda suck at it so I only do it in the shower:-)
Oh and Congratualtions on the new babe!
P.S. I don’t think it would be bad if you used your son’s middle name for the new baby. I think it would be a wonderful tribute for both of them to share.
-Misi