(I freaking love that movie.)

So…Who else has the cause for Ultimate Suffering? Wait, wait! I can answer that question.

The answer would be ME.

The check engine light is back on in my car.

I would say that the popping sound you just heard was my brain exploding, but to be honest, it exploded so many times last week, it really hasn’t recovered yet.  My husband said that he talked to the mechanic about this possibility and that it probably isn’t a big deal and something that can be fixed at our leisure but we have to get it scanned (again) and I have to look at the damn engine light being on while I drive (again).

SuckasuckaSUCK.

Since I don’t want to just concentrate on car suck a duck, here are some other random bullets of yada yada yada.

• I get to see one of my college roommates for lunch and and a manicure/pedicure today.  I have to have my nails done for my role in Thoroughly Modern Millie and I have to say that I am really a fan of it. I NEVER paint my own nails.  I always end up looking like Lizzie Borden after her big axe workout with the folks.  They look horrible. Having someone else do it is pretty awesome.

• Since I only get paid for doing the show at the end of the run, I will have a nice little sum of money.  It will probably be put towards debt but I would LOVE it to be put towards a Nikon D60. I like having a little money of my own. It makes me really keep thinking about how I wish I had some skill that was actually profitable. Everything I’m good at is usually low or non-paying. Yippee.

• I’m getting freaked out about BlogHer.  Mainly? I AM FRIGHTENED I WILL BE A DEER IN HEADLIGHTS WHEN YOU INTRODUCE YOURSELF AND I WILL NOT KNOW WHO YOU ARE OR RECOGNIZE WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE OR REMEMBER YOUR NAME.  Because most of the time I call people by their blog name in emails, conversations and in my head. I am scared that I will just draw a big, fat blank when put in social situation.

• Mid-July is going to be an experiment in travel hell.  I get back from BlogHer on the 20th. I have a show on the 21st and I leave to Seattle for a family reunion on the 22nd. Did I mention I will be driving in a van with TWELVE OTHER PEOPLE?  It is almost enough to make me want to walk the pier and give $5 blowjobs to come up with airfare. (Except I live in a desert, so there is no pier. And that pesky TMJ issue I have probably wouldn’t jive with my master plan, either. Freak. I can’t even make money at the world’s oldest profession. This doesn’t bode well for that whole “Career plan” that I’ve been thinking about. Crap).

Well, this post has been rather random and inappropriate.  What can I say? I like keeping you on your toes.

Tell them that you have tickets for the earliest matinée of Wall-E on opening day.

(I actually think I’m more excited than they are.)

**Edit**

I FREAKING LOVED IT.

Any robot that is enamored with Hello, Dolly! is totally awesome in my book. Go see it! (And, NO. There is no cool thing at the end, so don’t wait around for the neverending credits unless you just dig stuff like that.)

To Karen on her birthday.

You are a inspiration to me. (I know. It’s cheesy. Hey, I could have broken out into a rendition of “Wind Beneath My Wings”, so consider yourself lucky.)

You are an awesome friend. I hope your birthday rocks and I can’t wait to see ya.

Happy Birthday!

I am home.

Yay!

The mechanics got my car fixed yesterday by closing time and so I was able to get home in time to have dinner with my family and get everyone (including myself) tucked into bed.  Finally.

The best news of all is that the total bill came to $275 instead of $900.  It turns out that when they ripped the car apart, my timing belt was fine. So, they just replaced the O2 sensor and all is well.

It does suck because I think it cost me another day being stranded but in the end I would prefer this outcome. While I loved getting to spend time with people that are all kinds of awesome I really, really, REALLY missed being at home.  (To answer some of the questions and emails, Jon and I did discuss him coming to get me. It wasn’t THAT far away but due to the fact that this mechanic was the closest Volkswagen mechanic to our home,things with our other car, the number of trips it would take and how much gas would come to, we decided I should just stay put.)

Anyway, I have a million things to do. Jon did a good job keeping the house up while I was gone, but I am totally out of food in the house and then I have to review my lines and music because I have another show tonight.  I am totally grateful that I didn’t have any shows during this whole thing. That would have been horrible.

Oh, and I ordered my business cards for BlogHer. I placed the order for 100 from moo.com, but thought about it and decided that I should have more on hand just in case. I am debating ordering another 100 from moo or ordering some plain cardstock ones that are regular size. Dunno.

I’m also worried that I may have been a wee bit too cheeky on them.

Here is the front:

On the back?

Loralee C—–

http://loraleeslooneytunes.com

In a perfect world, this space would contain a

pithy tidbit written to lure more readers to my blog.

(Reality sucks a duck, yo.)

Now I just have to decide if I am brave enough to actually hand them out to people.  Maybe I’ll leave the wittiness off of the next set I order.

Question for those attending BlogHer or those who have attended in the past.

How many business cards are you ordering?

I’m way behind on ordering (you know, because of that whole pesky CAR SUCK issue I’ve had this week) and need to get this done.

100? 200?  What?

When I went to England and Scotland last year with my friend Michelle, we were polar opposites in terms of packing.  Her suitcase was a thing of BEAUTY-streamlined, well organized, and she packed the perfect amount of things. Yup, that Chelly is a lean, mean, packing machine.

I, on the other hand, ended up lugging around a carry on, a humongous laptop bag and an extra large suitcase that weighed just over 50 lbs. and had a bright pink label stuck on it from the airport baggage people that basically said, “I AM A FAT ASS! DO NOT ATTEMPT TO LIFT WITHOUT A FORKLIFT OR INTRICATE PULLEY SYSTEM AND SAFETY GOGGLES!!!”

Yah. I’m bright like that.

From that point on, it seems like my packing skills (or lack thereof) have just deteriorated.  Let’s take my preperation to take a quick weekend jaunt down to Salt Lake that has ended up as a five day experiement in car repair horror.

I woke up, showered, brushed my teeth and threw some random things in a bag.

Such planning and preperation! So, given this information do any of you really find it THAT surprising that I ended up on this little “Broken down car adventure” with NO PAJAMAS and FIVE PAIRS OF SHOES?

I have to clarify that two of these pairs were bought at a BOGO sale before I found out how hideous my car repair bill would be.  And come on! These two pairs of adorableness for $25.00???? 

Yah, I really don’t feel THAT horrible about it.  Although, I do admit that I HAVE TO STOP BUYING SHOES OR THIS SUMMER SHALL BE KNOWN AS THE IMELDA MARCOS INCIDENT OF ‘08!!!! (I also should stop using so many capital letters when I post.)

Gah.

While I do love my new shoes and can’t really regret them because of the fabulous buy that they were, I will cop to feeling very foolish that when I was flinging my personal belongings into a duffle bag, I somehow thought it was appropriate to pack three pairs of wedge sandals along on a two-day trip but only one bra.

(I know, I know. You all wish you were me.)

Thank goodness for Target.

What was supposed to be a quickish trip to drop off my nephew and see some bloggity friends became a trip fraught with difficulty and awfulness due to a broken down car. I had to drive 30 miles an hour on the freeway and even though I had my hazard lights on I was screamed at, sworn at, flipped off and had a 44 oz. soda cup thrown at my window.  It was also 105-degrees and I couldn’t turn on the air conditioner AND my glasses broke.

Wow, has this whole thing suckasuckaSUCKED.

The good news is that I had people that were around to help me out. Fun, lovely people that make me laugh and also helped forget I was pretty much stranded and stuck in a flaming bag of poo on the porch of a situation.  Maddie, Jon Deal and Sarah graciously let me tag along with them around Salt Lake and Sarah put me up for the night and I managed to find a mechanic that specializes in VW’s.  Plus, I have accommodations until my car is fixed.

The bad news? It will cost me NINE HUNDRED DOLLARS to fix the timing belt and O2 sensor on my car. Nine HUNDRED dollars.  Right after moving.  Right before BlogHer.

Ouch.

I would write more (OH, would I write more) but my internet access is fairly limited and will be so until I get home sometime on Wednesday night.

Pardon the loud, booming sound. That was my brain exploding.

Thanks to Jon Deal and Sarahbellum, I finally watched the series finale of “Friends”.

I’m kinda slow.

(OMG! She got off the plane!!!)