As a former Utahn transplanted to the Midwest, I’d like to take a moment to warn you non-Utahns about this pretty little state I used to call home and the one Loralee currently resides in.
(By the way, my name is Casey, I call a little blog moosh in indy. my home, hi, how are you?)
First of all, don’t let all the snow fool you. Utah is a desert. Utah is a desert that will suck your skin of any and all moisture it possesses within moments of your arrival. Bring lotion and slather liberally.
Second. Salt Lake is very high in altitude. This means two things. Less oxygen and you’re closer to the sun. Which means you will huff and puff up every flight of stairs no matter how fast you can run a mile at sea level and you will burn to a crisp much quicker. Bring a bottle of water and sunscreen, drink and slather liberally.
Third. There is an enormous lake thataway. It’s called the Great Salt Lake. It’s really salty. Don’t go in it after you have shaved and be aware that when conditions are just right there is something called “Lake Stink.” And trust me, it’s a whole new kind of stink.
Fourth. Want to move here? Just know it’s really bloody expensive. The house I grew up in was bought in 1981 for $40K. It sold in 1998 for $189K. Today? $500K. Ridiculous.
Fifth. Drivers. Utah drivers are stupid, idiotic, psychotic, insane, aggressive, rude, impolite and most of them drive large overpriced SUV’s. Driving in Utah is not for the faint of heart. Be prepared to honk and flip off liberally. Seriously, before I come I have to spend an entire day readying myself for the death derby on Utah’s roads.
Sixth. If you eat outside in Utah, especially a sandwich, it will be turned to toast in a matter of moments. Dry air + soft bread = See dry skin reference in numero uno.
Lastly. Utah is pretty. Both in people and surroundings.
Forbes names Salt Lake City the vainest city in the nation. No doubt. Plastic surgery billboards are everywhere. Everywhere. And it’s just not fair to the rest of the country how pretty Utah is. (Well, the top and bottom of Utah at least, I’ve still never learned to embrace that whole sagebrush thing going on in the middle.) So be prepared for pretty, but don’t look too long or that soccer mom in the Escalade with run. you. over.
Thank you for taking time to learn about this state from someone who knows best. A native. And if you could let me know about any other states crazy drivers I should watch out for I’d appreciate it. But I doubt anyone has worse drivers than Utah. Seriously.
Good news though? Lots of pretty things to look at in your sideview mirrors while the PTA president on her cell phone in the Lexus SUV is chewing you out.














My Mormon college boyfriend used to sweat PROFUSELY when it got an eensy bit humid in Oregon – because he was used to the super dryness of Utah and SE Idaho. It made me laugh – because Oregon? So not humid.
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Crazy real estate prices? Psychotic drivers? Man, I’d feel right at home, wouldn’t I? :)
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As a fellow native Utahn living in another state, I have to say all the above applies to Colorado as well, but times it by three!
Colorado has drier air and even less oxygen than Utah. I never had dry skin or got out of breath climbing a flight of stairs until I moved to Denver. My 2 bedroom condo cost more than a 3 bedroom house would in Utah, and don’t even get me started on Colorado drivers. Half of them drive crazy fast like Utah drivers, and the other half drive 10-15 miles under the speed limit. Why would anyone drive 25mph in a 40mph zone, then slam on the gas pedal as a light turns yellow? Why? And EVERYONE makes a left hand turn into whatever lane they want to, even if it means cutting across three lanes of traffic. So beware of Colorado drivers too. At least Denver has no lake stink!
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We thought about moving out of utah for various reasons, but decided to stay. My husband/kids *love* the skiing- a direct result of the desert air. We went on a weekend tour of 2 national parks, 3 state parks and a handful of national forests all in 3 days – can you beat that? All of the family is here, so cousins galore.
Drivers are agressive, but most people are incredibly nice. Most.
I don’t feel like I need to defend the craziness that is Utah (especially the liquor laws! Dargh!), but there are some really great reasons to live here, too.
The Okanagan (where I live) is a similar climate to Utah (Loralee and I chat about this often). We have a humidifier attached to the furnace to keep us all from drying out and fossilizing.
I go through more lotion than anyone should have to fork over money for.
The upside? Mold is never an issue, and I do not own an umbrella.
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I think a lot of people in a lot of places would scoff at points 4 and 5. Depending on your background, driving and buying real estate in Utah is kid’s stuff. LA, for example.
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I thought Utah had bad drivers, until I took my first cross-country road trip to Boston, down through New York to DC and all the way back. Country’s worst (most clueless) drivers? Nebraskans, hands down. And their state is ugly so that only makes the bad driving more irritating. But seriously, I think the problem with Utah drivers is that they’re not assertive enough. At least when you’re driving in Manhattan, for instance, you know you have to assert yourself or you won’t make it. Out here, people expect you to slow down for them and let them in once they put their blinker on. They don’t get that they are the ones who need to adjust their speed in order to change lanes.
And what’s this about expensive living? Relative to most similar metropolitan areas, it’s pretty reasonable. But having said that, real estate is pretty much ridiculous everywhere.
If you live in Utah long enough, you hardly even need lotion at all. Your body just adjusts to the dryness.
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I don’t know… In California, if you don’t obey the 2-second rule (when traveling in the fast lane and someone faster comes up behind you, you have two seconds to get over into the slow lane), then you can expect some pretty aggressive behavior. It took my husband (who is originally from Wyoming) a good while to get used to and embrace that one.
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i used to live in a college town. people drive completely insane there. mostly b/c they’re drunk and underage. compared to most places, it’s rather small, but where i came from, it was huge to me.
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I agree with everything except the referance to real estate prices. I’d love to pay Utah prices for housing! I’ve lived in 8 states, and Utah is by far the cheapest for housing.
Michigan has the worst drivers – Suburban Detroit. Not only do we have bad drivers with road rage, but we have potholes that will swallow your car whole.
Nice pics, by the way!
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Okay: Drink, slather, honk and flip off liberally. Consider it done.
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Having lived in Utah for many years, I am speaking with a fair amount of authority when I say that:
a) Drivers in Las Vegas are FAR WORSE than Utah.
b) The air is way drier in Southern Nevada. Way, way, way driver.
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I’ve never been to Utah, but I’d like to visit.
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The drivers here are the worst. Especially for a supposedly Christian state – total assholes!
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Utah sounds a lot like south Florida only our drivers are all over the age of 65 and drive Giant Cadillac DeVille, that drive 20MPH.
I wish I had read your guide before my husband took his job here. We would have stayed unemployed drinking beer out of a keg in our backyard.
I live in what Loralee has affectionately called The Detroit of Utah (ogden) and I can’t wait to get the heck out of here. I was all excited on Saturday to see a Grand Opening sign on Riverdale. Wonderful, a new store. It turned out to be another Dollar Store. Seriously? We need another one? I give up!
there’s no place like home, there’s no place like home……
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I never, ever, ever in a million years would have guessed the vainest state thing. NEVER. I totally would have handed that off to CA.
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I think Boston, MA would give Utah a run for worst drivers. Rude, impatient and…did I mention RUDE?!
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“Left Brained” Tee Hee Hee!
ok…so there are bad drivers everywhere. noted. oh wait…nobody mentioned texas. they have signs on the road that say “drive texas friendly”. i think i’ll stick to texas. of course living in turkey and seeing the driving here makes most everything in the states seem tame. there are no such things as traffic laws…just traffic suggestions. so what that there are stripes painted on the road to show that it is three lanes. five cars can easily fit so that is what they do. seriously!
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used to play Airsoft but i stopped after some guy accidentally shot my eye ~