Jonathan and I discussing someone we call, “Nick”.
“Man, Nick has a lot more connections than I do.”
“Yeah, but he’s also a lot older than you are.”
“Not really…We’re pretty close in age.”
“Seriously? He looks older than you.”
“Yeah, he does look older than he is.”
“Don’t you find it odd that he runs around with inappropriate-looking 21-year-olds dangling on his arm all the time?”
“You mean that there’s something wrong with that? I’m all for inappropriate-looking 21-year-olds!”
“So, does this mean it is a good time to tell you about my collegiate lover Alberto who is here studying in a foreign exchange program?”
“I guess it’s as good a time as any. Did I mention the harem I picked up last week?”
“Hey, I’m ALL down with Harems as long as they know how to clean bathrooms, put away laundry and mop my floor. Oh, and they can’t have better boobs than me.”
“I never knew I was married to such a petty person.”
“Yeah. Life’s a bitch, isn’t it?”
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You two banter like we banter! I never thought I would meet our match! Perhaps one day we should have a Couples’ Banter Tournament. The winner gets the Heavyweight Title. That way, if you win, I can feel good about my title being thinner than your title. ;)
i loved this post! it sounds exactly like something we would say. ours often centers around the fact that deep down inside my husband is a lesbian…or a large black woman who might be a lesbian. yeah…those are fun times!
I would love to have a harem if they did all of my cleaning! I wouldn’t sleep with them or anything, but man, a harem of cleaning, sexless gods would be fantastic!
Jeremy and I always joke about my latin lover (fill in blank with odd latin sounding name) who’s name always changes. he likes to pop in whenever Jeremy isn’t home, apparently, and ravage me.
We joke that Jeremy’s got an older “woman friend” at work, b/c so many of them like him and flirt with him, and b/c at 25, I AM the younger woman.
Though actually, we think its his boss who’s doing that particular older woman… don’t tell his wife!
This conversation sounds so familiar. In my house I would never be able to ask that the harem not have better boobs than me, though – it would be pretty much a given that theirs would be better. My girls have never been large or perky and after breastfeeding two kids I fear they are a little worse for wear.
Melain: Bantering is one thing I am very, very good at. And, ya know…The other stuff. Heh.
Natalie: HA HA HA HA HA HA. My husband has claimed to be a lesbian before.
Doug: You freaking slay me. Can I be in your Harem, too? I wouldn’t clean, though. Strictly supervisory position for me.
Charli: Your husband is totally a hottie, that’s for sure. My husband makes a rather large deal of our 2year age difference. He called me “Granny” once.
Andi: That would be why I surgically reclaimed mine. (GRIN)
haha. this all sounds WAY too familiar to me!
Ask your husband where he got that Harem.
I want one.
And I don’t care if they have nicer tits than me. As long as they let me ogle them freely.
i can’t help but smile and shake my head at the conversations you two have.
but what doesn’t surprise me is that your husband has claimed to be a lesbian.
my dad likes to tell this joke – a man in a cowboy hat is sitting at a bar having a beer. this woman comes up to him and asks him what he does. he explains to her what he does and then he asks her what she does. she says i’m a lesbian. i think about women, i sleep with women, i dream about women. he thinks upon this and the woman says goodbye. a little while later, another woman comes up to him and asks him what he does. he says…i thought i was a cowboy but i just found out i’m a lesbian.
LL, you sure can be in my harem, but the supervisory position has been filled. So grab a broom and get to work.
I’m sure he meant to say “I never knew I was married to such a PRETTY person.â€
Right? LOL But if harem’s do all that, Jason can get one… as long as they keep their hands off each other. I would love to have the help.
You guys are all kinds of awesome.
And haha–reading Jackie’s comment, I just realized that I HAD read it as, “Pretty” not “Petty”—now “Life’s a bitch.” make a lot more sense.