I feel like my head is going to explode.
Today is Day Two of eating better, going to the gym and not consuming gallons of Diet Coke. As one commenter pointed out, caffeine withdrawal can SUCK.
It’s true, my head is not taking to caffeine abstinence very well.
And my body, let’s talk about my body for a moment.
While it has been a lot more sore in my life, it is still feeling the effects of not being in a gym for the better part of a year. Thank goodness that I took time to stretch or I have a feeling that it would have been much, much worse. I sat in the steam room for awhile, but I admit that I was a bit put off by the buck nekkid woman who insisted on sitting with her legs spread wide open the entire time I was in there.
I’d forgotten how many unwanted girly bits you see in a woman’s locker room.
I mean, I am no prude, and I understand that the towels that they have at the gym are itty bitty but seriously, could you maybe, just MAYBE consider that people around you don’t want to see your hoo-hoo and bajanga bits and to wear a towel around your waist? Or at least not sit naked on the bench in the steam room doing a spread-leg hamstring stretch so the first thing I see when I walk in is not the Chewbacca clone you have between your legs, ok?
Sorry people, but I really think that God’s aesthetic design team were all out with the flu when this section of the anatomy was designed and the outer packaging was left to the donut delivery guy and rushed through for approval.
I am now going to go take a hundred Aleve and try to get my body to curl in the fetal position.
Oh, one more thing. The charger doohicky on the back of my 3-month-old laptop is shorting out. Does anyone know if that is fixable? Or am I screwed. (And no, I don’t have a warranty.)
Did I mention that my head feels like it’s going to explode??
Filed under: 
I have totally been there! Keep it up though because it is worth it once you get through the bad part (I promise it doesn’t last too long). Oddly enough, caffeine-free carbonated drinks would help me once I got past the bad withdrawal stage. Tava is really good if you can find, otherwise good old caffeine-free soda. Good luck!!
Its not fixable, you have to buy a new one. Sorry to have to say that Loralee.
Thats funny, chewbacca……the female body is beautiful, I would rather look at that then any mans body anyday. LOL
You are so funny Loralee, I know I can always get a good laugh from you. Hey, we will be seeing you guys in MAY!!!!!!! thought that I would toss that out to ya
oh i tried giving up coffee once, but my husband refused to let me continue – I hope you are able to push through the pain barrier of addiction – I think it is six weeks to create a new habit? Does it take that long to break one? I dunno – I hope for your sake it is sooner than later.
teehee – thats funny what you saw at the gym – because it was you that saw it, and I only had to read about it!
ew to nasty nekkid lady with her wide-spread legs. stretch somewhere else.
I have been one month without Diet Coke. I feel your pain my darling.
Good luck and may the DC force be with you!
Okay, this is going to get confusing, but this is me, LoLee. You know, your crazy Southern friend from the land of leper colonies and mint juleps.
So, you made me laugh out loud with your talk of hoohoos and design by doughnut guys. Bwa ha ha ha ha!!!!!!
Good luck with the cafeinne withdrawals. I know they can be a pain. Hang in there, girly.
Chewbacca = EEEKK!
At least it’s not a “Curious George”… Hank and The Twins, Twig ‘n’ Berries, etc.
But I’m with Kyle – as long as you’re not bakin’ bread in there, the female bod is HOT HOT HOT… As long as the gardener has been around to prune the shrubbery a bit lately, that is…
:)
can’t stop laughing!! Left up to the donut guy! you crack me up…
I think maybe you should wean yourself off diet coke rather than cold turnkey…2 a day for a week, then 1 a day for a week and then 1 every 2 days and so forth until you are off!
:)
Be cautious with the Aleve! My husband used to take it like candy! When his dr. found out, he really chewed him out. Seems the Aleve was one of the causes of his shortness of breath and wheezing!!! He doesn’t take it anymore, and was able to quit using his nebulizer twice a day!
you are a WAY better woman than i. diet coke is like oxygen for me.
I agree with ali, I live on Diet Coke, especially since I started my job and have to be up at 5:30 am and function all day
HEEEE!!!!
Oh, how I love you.
Sorry about the DC hangover. I gave it up when trying to get pregnant and IT SUCKED.
BWAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAAHAH! Chewbacca clone???? Really??? (insert visual of me peeing my pants with laughter) I am scheduling my bikini wax tomorrow! I won’t tell you the Steam Room horror stories I have, but don’t worry, they were in a Salt Lake gym.
And, um, sorry about the Idaho thing – a girl can dream…
Once again, you have made me laugh out loud! Halarious post! Best of luck to you! And did I miss something? Were you thinking of moving to Idaho? (from your side blog)
really, people are not modest in the locker room?? I guess I would just not go in there….take your shower at home, and dont bring anything with you that you cannot carry.
well llc hope that you and your head will feel better soon
As a painfully single guy I can get turned on easily. The thought of a sexy locker room story was quickly replaced by a horrific tale of grotesque nakedness.
I’m afraid now that the only way I I’ll be able to get these images out of my head is with a bullet.
If I am never able to have sex again I know exactly who to blame.
I am glad to see you alive and posting, even if it is just barely. Hang in there.
One more thing, the steam room is probably a really good idea since you are detoxing from the junk. I find it ironic that there is a Diet Coke icon staring me in the face by your comment box.
oh loralee. you are a funny funny girl. i loved the hoo hoo story. and the great part is that you do such a good job describing it in detail that those of us who never set foot in a gym know exactly what it looked like. now…i am just trying to figure out how to go get the liter of diet coke out of my refrigerator without my cleaning lady seeing it. she is in the kitchen and will ask for some if she knows it’s there. (i know, i know…i have a cleaning lady…i should be willing to share the diet coke with someone who cleans my dirty house. but this is turkey. she comes cheap and i’m not that easy!)
i say naked in steam room, ok… even without towel round waist- even just sitting demurely on towel… but spread-eagled and stretching, um, NO! there should be a sign up banning it! and it should become a universal symbol… like the no-smoking sign. ah, if only i were a graphic artist… the fun i would have :)
Vx
Hoo Hoo’s? Chewbacca? That’s just the withdrawal talking! Gross mental image, by the way! I’m sure the real thing was waaaaaay worse!
Perhaps coming off the Diet Coke gradually would be less head explodish?
And locker rooms and saunas full of women in various states of undress? I’m sure it’s someone’s fantasy but definitely not mine. Yick!
I’m all for going off it slowly – maybe drink some tea.. you don’t want to give yourself a massive migraine… seriously. take care.
xoxo
if trent never has sex again he’s blaming you.
bwahahaha. now THAT’S a good one.
I’m with Holli and Izzy–maybe cold turkey isn’t the best way to get off the DC. I know when my mom went off of it years ago, she had headaches the size of Texas. Maybe gradual? I wish you the best. Kicking the caffeine habit is sooooo hard. But you will feel so much better once it’s all gone!
Oh, university dressing rooms are the worst because I don’t think anyone has cleaned them in…years. Seriously. The stink in there is awful. Ugh. Fortunately, I haven’t had to view a lot of naughty bits. My condolences to your eyes.
What gym do you go to? (“Brand” name, I mean.) I’m looking to join one after being done with school (there’s just no time to go to one right now), and I was wondering if you liked yours, if they have good deals and trainers, etc. Professional gym newbie here! :) Good luck with the working out, too!
That was quite a picture you painted there! Ewww, chewbacca!
so this means that you’re powering your own website now, right? i mean, there’s even a lil diet coke logo at the bottom of the page. lol.
but seriously, good for you. it sucks for the first bit (and i get it…me with no coffee = nightmarish, grumpy hag) but you feel so much more confident after, like you enjoy it instead of needing to have it. or at least i did.
and lol/ew = chewbacca.
you’re still a-1 hot though. with or without gym. but i think, once the aleve kicks in, you’ll love it.
First of all I must say eww to the locker room thing.
Secondly I actually just had a computer with that very problem and it is fixable, but you should get a move on because ours started jiggling wires loose and ended up shorting the whole farking comp out. So. I would say go get it fixed while it’s not too bad.
Maybe the Missing Link Hoo-Ha owner was just a dietcokeless hallucination?
And why is it that the people who look the WORST nekkid are always the ones to don tube tops and speedos and recline to impossible naked angles when sitting in steam rooms???
I feel all dirty now. And not in a fun way.
The Diet Coke thing is a good reminder for me. I went off caffeine 6 years ago when I got pregnant, and I was a DIET COKE FREAK, and IT WAS THE HARDSEST THING I HAVE EVER DONE… and I have been slipping lately and having it every once in a while. The siren calls again…. I must suppress her….
This no caffeine crap is going to kill me. Every single day it feels like someone is jamming a large rod into my head. Then again, this is what happens if one consumes roughly 64ozs of coffee a day and then stops abruptly.
It’s painful as you well know.
Didn’t your mom ever tell you that playing with your “doohicky” too much could make it fall off?
I’ll type quietly, I hope you feel better. I didn that caffeine withdrawl thing 10 years ago and still remember how hideous it is for the first week (to 10 days), but you will make it. Amen about the gym show–geez people get some clothes on (and DON’T SIT ON BENCHES WHEN NAKED–Oh, so sorry for yelling).